I gots a thugged-out daughter Called Coraline she used ta have brown afro not blue then dat biiiiatch wanted it blue. Yeah Yo ass now what tha fuck her ass is Like coraline found a lil door up in a livin room While I be hustlin dat thugged-out biiiatch called mah crazy ass when I opend tha door„„There was brick’s. Then dat freaky freaky biatch had a thugged-out trip of tha door dat thugged-out biiiatch chase tha rats then dat biiiiatch went all up in tha door. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch saw me cookin n’ I Turned round I had button up in mah eyes. When her big-ass booty holla’d it was up in her trip I don’t belive her muthafuckin ass. I holla’d dat her ass is ridiclus n’ dat freaky freaky biatch had they Other Muthafucka when I came back she missed Me n’ Charlie. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch is mad her ass is seein thangs. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. So thats tha end of it n’ I Went ta tha gardenin Well I be bustin work by now her ass is tha one whoz ass dosent, wanna go school.
You bump into a man on the subway wearing a trenchcoat. You apologize and he responds “Its alright. We’re only human. All of us. All of us here are human. Yep. Very human. I’m probably the most human here! You betcha.” and then the trenchcoat falls and the figure collapses and roughly 1000 salamanders scatter around the train
I thought this was a fandom post but I was so, so wrong